1st Beta

I got my beta back on tuesday (taken Monday @ 13DPO). It was 197! Yay. After that I started to feel a lot better that this was for real. But, I would be lying if I said I wasn't CAUTIOUSLY expecting. I don't know when I'm going to feel comfortable enough to tell people, it's not going to be anytime too soon. I hope that I get a 2nd beta on Monday the 10th, my first prenatal appointment!!! I will be 4w6d, so it will be too soon for an u/s. Can't wait!

My BFP

Well, I've been testing since 8 DPO...The morning of 10 DPO, I saw a negative, but a little part of me thought I saw SOMETHING, but honestly it looked negative. So, I held my pee for 4 hours, tested again around 1030pm, and I swore I saw something there. But, I knew where that line should be, so I thought my brain was making it up, hahaha. So, I asked G to look, and he said he saw something, but didn't want to get his hopes up.

11DPO, FMU got a "pregnant" on the digital, and a SUPER faint line on a internet cheapy. So, I told G at 545a in the morning! Hahahaha. He said, "Really? It said pregnant?" cuddled me and fell back asleep. I couldn't sleep. I had no REAL symptoms, and was skeptical it was real/would stick (still am cautious).

Later that morning (8am-ish) I had a hair apt. DH was planning on driving me so he could take the dogs for a walk. We were also hoping to stop at my parent's house to have coffee (Since the salon is near my parent's house). We went outside to get into the car, and saw that it HAD BEEN BROKEN INTO!!!!! The back window was smashed, the sterio was ripped out (and gone). Upon further investigation, G realized his 80g video iPod was stolen too. So, I drove myself to the apt in our other car, while DH waited for the police, etc. Since G and I never seem to have something great happen without something annoying/bad happening, when I saw the robbed car I said, "We're definitely pregnant." We both laughed and nodded in agreement.

G met up with me later that morning, after having coffee w/my parents. He originally thought it would be funny to take the digital over to my parent's house and just leave it somewhere they would find (while we were there). But, coffee plans changed after the break in...and we were still debating whether we should tell them yet. My parent's decided to have breakfast down the street from where we were. So, we bought another digital, it was positive. So, we rolled it up in a bag, and met them at the restaurant (but couldn't stay). We asked the server to give them the bag after we left...The called me shortly after we left and were really excited, and said we got them good. Hahahahahaha.

I explained it was early, and we wanted to see the lines get darker before we got too chatty about it. Seriously though, I can't wait to call my Dr. I've been POAS all weekend b/c I want to see the line get darker. It was darker last night...and my boobs are pretty sore. I just want to see a decent beta now. Thank goodness for sensitive digitals!!! I would have drank Saturday, because we wouldn't have believed the cheapies! Human's who were not longing for a BFP would not have been able to see the lines!

My parents stopped by the house Saturday night, and gave us a bag of books from Barns&Nobel. They picked out some awesome books, that covered all the bases! Currently, the only people that know are my parents and G's parents, sister and brother.

Losing Hope

Well I POAS this morning, and BFN of course. I'm at 8 DPO and even though I know the test means nothing, I still feel like I'm out. I read all the siggy's of the lovely ladies on the bump, and for whatever reason, the Dx that require fertility treatments always bring me down more than seeing the pregnancy tickers brings me up. I guess I'm temporarily a glass half empty kind of girl. Boooooooooooooo.

6 DPO

This week is going to seem soooo long. I really want to test around 10 DPO or so. I did the pineapple core this past week, just incase, what could it hurt. This part of the 2ww always is the hardest. I am so behind on work too so, I'm not really sure how awesome this week is going to be unless I get a BFP. He he he.

Cycle #9, 2WW and Kitchen Reno

I haven't blogged in a while (again) b/c I've seriously been pulling 12-18 hours days on the weekends renovating, and renovating from the time I get home after work until bed time. Finally, I am not so busy...and voila! I'm in the 2ww. Even though I scheduled, and then cancelled my HSG this cycle because I had a feeling I would O a little earlier this cycle, it still sneaked up on me. G and I missed a couple days of lovin' over the weekend b/c we were so exhausted from the reno all weekend. But, oh well, I still got a few good sessions in there, and hopefully that is enough.

Now that I'm in the 2ww, I've defaulted to my original motivated do this, do that attitude, and cut out the caffeine. I also thought I would try the pineapple core this cycle, JIK. So, today I chopped that core into 5 not-so-equal pieces and popped one in my mouth. Not too bad, but I don't recommend doing this right after brushing your teeth! (I forgot, OK? I rarely drink orange juice so I'm not familiar w/the citrus-toothpaste rule).

Cycle #9...CYCLE #9...CYCLE #9...Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. We are supposed to avoid for two cycles after this one, if we don't get our BFP. But, those dates were decided back when I first started TTC, and since I've been having much shorter cycles than expected, it looks like we have one more month AND THEN we have to start TTA. Also, it looks like were are going to get the HSG next cycle for sure. It's probably good too b/c if there are any issues, we will have some time while TTA to figure out what we want to do, and get things taken care of so we are ready to go when we start TTC again.

Kitchen Renovation!!!

So this weekend we started the REAL kitchen renovation. We have done things here and there, the behind the wall stuff...the super important, renovation obstacles that HAVE to be done for the kitchen to WORK. Now we're onto the fun stuff that really doesn't look worse before it gets better. This is the stuff that you can actually see and feel is CHANGING your kitchen for the better. This weekend we completed step ONE! The cabinets. Next weekend is the counter tops, and then the following weekend is the floors (hardwood/laminate).

We painted and drilled the cabinets. Hung them, and installed some new appliances. For the first time in 4 years, I will have a DISHWASHER!!! G and I have been washing our dishes by hand since we got married, and I cannot believe that we won't have to do that anymore! No more dishes drying in racks and on towels by the tens. No more counter space wasted! I cannot believe that this is actually happening. We've been waiting to make all these changes since we moved in 2.5 years ago. We also have an over-the-range microwave now...freeing up yet more counter space, and eliminating the need for a fan in the kitchen. Bye-bye old-school kitchen ceiling fan! We can put a nice light fixture in there, to bring the room together. So exciting (even after going to Lowes a million times, and watching at my bank account dwindle).

Oh, and I have to give a shout out to the 'rents for donating their extra fridge that just happened to be black (the color of all our appliances) and a few inches narrower and taller than our current one. Without that, we would have had to purchase a new "smaller" fridge to accommodate the dishwasher. The bonus? We were going to swap fridges; but, my parent's were really interested in a brand new, double doored, stainless steal fridge that their friends were selling for only $200, because the house they just bought down the street from them, came with one. So, they bought it, and now we have an extra fridge in the garage! Yay!

The down side of these renos is that even though I helped a lot, G did most of the work w/my dad's help. So, guess what I got to do today??? MOW THE LAWNS!!! Lemme tell ya, it was my first time too! I know that's hard to believe; but, I had an older brother who had that as a chore b/c I was little and couldn't start the mower. Once he was out of the house, we moved and rented a place where the yard work was all done for us. In college and before getting married, I always rented...then in our home, G was a FT student w/no job and lots of free time. He also likes to do the lawn care. So, today was my 1st time doing more than tending the gardens and flowers beds (which I do, exclusively). I have to say, I did a pretty good job (but, I left the wipper snipper work for G, he he he).

I can't wait to take pictures in a few weeks when it's all done, and throw up the before and afters! Then, we'll be on to the rest of the home decorating. I just couldn't paint, or decorate or anything until the heart of the home was in order. Soon it will be, and soon our house that looks as though a bachelor lives here, will finally look as though a loving couple lives here!

HSG this cycle = FAIL!

Well, I called on the 1st day of my period, like I was instructed. The nurse says, "When did you start your period? Well, I'm sorry to tell you this but both of the staff that do this proceedure will be out of the office on vacation during the time that you need to come in. It really doesn't happen very often. Please call back next cycle." And that's it, that's all...So, my lucky streak of appointments, and being seen in a timely manner has come to and end. Boo.

I'd be lying if I wasn't hoping to capitalize on the fact that an HSG is supposed to increase your fertility for several months after the proceedure. Oh well. Here's to hoping that it's not necessary and I get pg this next cycle. Of course, that would also mean hoping that my TSH levels have already reduced in this short period of time. I can say, that I can tell a difference already. I felt a difference the first morning on this increased dose. ::repeats:: I think I can, I think I can...

On another note, I'm running a half marathon on Saturday!!! I'm completely unprepared. Last week, I had a terrible time getting my workouts in, and this week of course, I'm not supposed to push it too much. I guess this wouldn't be the 1st half marathon I've had to wing (oops...). So, I'm leaving for Niagara-on-the-Lake tomorrow, where I'll meet up with my parents and BIL and SIL, and we're bringing the dogs! Should be a great time, and I'll be able to enjoy some post-race wine tasting...Yay!

My Appointment With the RE

Well, the RE was much more amazing than the nurse I talked to on the phone. The great thing about the Cleveland Clinic (and I'm sure most hospitals are on a similar system) is everything's all right there in the system.

The RE was able to look at G's chart from the IU, my OB/GYN info, and BW all at once on the comp. AND he DID look at everything. He basically took a ton of info, I answered his questions...theyTSH came up almost immediately, and he instantly said, "I can help you with that." As you can imagine, this put me right at ease. My biggest worry was that he was going to make me see someone else for this.

After getting all my info, he said, "Well, your prognosis is really good." I said even w/G's SA info? He's like "yes...I'm looking at that right now. I've yet to see anyone w/a 14 on morphology and you can donate sperm at 5." This reassured me b/c he sees healthy males all the time, not just men w/issues like the IU.

I didn't even have to talk to him about the BW, he said, "Looks like we caught you during your surge." AWESOME...last thing I needed was another Dr. to tell me I was premenopausal. He did say he wasn't worried about my FSH. But, when I get BW to see if my thyroid is under control in 2 mo. he would like to double check the FSH numbers and get my BW on CD3 (yay!). Two months from now, but it's a start.

He of course wrote me a Rx for the sythroid and....said, "I would like to see you at the low end of normal, like 1-2 range." Which is great b/c this means he really is looking at my TSH from a TTC POV. (as he should) He said, I expect I'll see you in here really soon, when you get an HPT+, we'll do an u/s and I'll kick you back to the OB, because you should be a low risk pg. Good to know.

He also said that I'm welcome to wait a few months, or until the year mark to get an HSG. But, since it's associated w/increased fertility, I'm welcome to do it anytime. Gave me the slip and told me what time in my cycle to schedule it if I "was in a hurry." All and all, it was sweet to be able to make some decisions and have some tools at my disposal. I can go into any of the CC BW labs w/o paper work b/c it's in the system, and the HSG is at my discretion.

He did say if things don't work out, and I reach a year, we can move forward w/some more scrutinizing tests. He's one of those that is "fine" w/charting. But, doesn't think it's necessary. He's not even a fan of OPKs because he thinks it's an added expense that you don't need if you're have sex regularly enough. So, I guess that works for me!

I Love you Doc. But I don't have to like you right now!

On Friday, I received the results of my BW. First thing Doc said was my TSH was high. I certainly wasn't shocked. But, I was a little angry at the fact that I had suspected my dose (synthroid) needed to be changed, and 1. hadn't pushed testing hard enough w/my OB/GYN and 2. my previous GP hadn't been concerned enough w/my symptoms to ask me to come in a few weeks for a follow-up test. My GP obviously got results that he felt didn't warrent an increase in dosage...but, when I requested these values, I was told by the receptionist that I could only get them the next time I was in the office!!! WTF!?! Well, the Dr. has left the practice and I do not intend w/signing on w/anyone other than an actual endocrinologist-as suggested by my OB/GYN on the phone (who said he would be happy to recommend one). 1 point OB.

Here's the kicker...the OB proceeded to tell me that I had some other funky numbers come up w/my LH. He said they were at pre-menopausal levels (high). Eh, hem...Dr.? How about before you go into questioning me about my periods you confirm on what CD you asked me to have this BW??? He asked me to go in Monday, and said that he wasn't concerned w/the cycle day (I guess because he wasn't testing for the estrogens and progesterone hormones). I went in on CD13...that evening I got my 1st OPK+ of the cycle!!! Of course my LH was high, I was signally ovulation! Pre-menopausal. Are you kidding me? -10 points OB.

Granted he told me right off the bat that I was welcome to see the RE from the start. He claimed he was more than happy to start seeing me as he was able to deal w/mild fertility issues...but, that was as far as he'd be able to take me. I didn't realize that he was that serious. I forget that Drs really only know about their specialties!!! Lesson learned. Regardless of pg issues, I will only be seeing an endocrinologist to manage my thyroid. Luckily, this RE that my Dr. has recommended is also an endocrinologist...So, he will be able to manage my thyroid, confirm my results (I cannot wait for re-test on appropriate CDs) and potentially help me get pg if we find I need help. If the RE doesn't believe his services are necessary, and kicks me back to my OB...I will start seeing the other Endo. Either way, I should benefit. Hopefully.....

Batter

The oven is pre-heated! My first cycle w/o charting is actually going quite well. No GTE this month, but I still got EWCM! I am taking the EPO, so perhaps that is the culprit after all. Like clockwork, I got an OPK+ two days after my first FCM, and looks like I'll be O'ing sometime today! I'm pretty lucky that my cycles were consistent enough over 6 cycles, to learn to gague my fertile time so I have a descent idea of where I am in my cycle. It looks like the 4 OPKs I had left over from last cycle were enough to get the job done. I haven't decided yet if I'm going to order some more for next cycle or not, I think I'll wait and see how this cycle turns out and see what the Dr. has to say about my BW.

Speaking of BW. G got some done yesterday, as well. He also had his IU apt. and the Urologist doesn't seem too concerned w/the morphology #. Since his count is so good, and his motility is damn near 100%, he felt had enough information to suggest getting moving w/me. That's why I got BW yesterday. When I relayed this info to my Dr. he was ready to go, and ordered the BW for that evening. As soon as we get that back, we move forward w/the HSG. G isn't out of the woods yet though. He still needs to do an U/S, and an additional SA w/DNA analysis. The latter takes about 3 weeks, and G has yet to schedule it. The U/S is scheduled for 6/10/09. So, it looks like G will be back for a f/u apt. w/the IU in about 4 weeks.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't hoping that we would still get pg on our own before that apt. comes.

To Chart or Not to Chart?

There's a lot of chart pushing on GP. It's almost like, if you don't chart, no one will take your TTC efforts seriously. Obviously, this is not the case w/many of the ladies on the board. But, there are so many woman that seem to think charting is NECCESSARY.

I personally do not think it is neccessary. Certainly, many woman get pregnant without it. Getting pregnant is all about having sex and getting lucky (So, I guess that would be, getting lucky then getting lucky again, lol.). There are two major strategies: Have sex often throughout your cycle, or timing intercourse during your fertile time. Both will get you pregnant.

I DO think charting is helpful for most. My ovulation date tends to fall into the old stand by of CD14. So, I probably would have been just fine aiming there. For others who have long or irregular cycles, it can be a god send. For these woman TTC can be exhausting. For other's they claim charting helps them save money. For me...that's not the case. I like to test at 8DPO (I know, I know). Since, I don't know exactly when that is now. I'm just waiting until CD28...since my cycles is rarely even 27 days.

The catch...charting has helped me pick out some clues as to when I'm going to ovulate and helped train me to recognize FCM. So, in the end I think it's good for everyone to chart at least a few cycles. But, you don't NEED to. Also, I think that it's perfectly fine to give yourself a few cycles the old fashioned way, or do as I did and chart to learn about your cycles then use that knowledge w/o charting.

Personally, I still make a mental note of my CM. I also keep track of where I am in my cycle. Of course, lots of sex! Can't really do much more than that, even if I am charting.

Boys Will Be Boys

So, G has been doing great being healthy. I can tell that he is in it for the long haul. It's so refreshing to have him show that he means business when becoming a dad, in all areas. I wish he didn't have to show it this way; but, I'm grateful that he's coming through. I just hope that all his efforts aren't for naught and that there isn't yet more that we have to address. I know there's still about a 25% that we haven't discovered all our obstacles. So, it will be about a month since G has been workin' on gettin his boys workin', by the time my fertile time comes around. In some cases that's long enough to have a significant improvement, and hence and increased chance for conception. In addition, G's apt. is coming up! At 1st I thought it would never get here, but now I just have to get through this weekend (and we all know how those just seem to fly by). Either way, I can just feel something coming our way...hopefully it's good news.

Speaking of boy's baby-making parts, my male dachshund has decided to become more, eh hem, masculine. Slowly over the past few months, he's been developing typical male behavior: marking and barking. It doesn't matter what type of punishment he gets, nothing has seemed to discourage his random dog aggression and territory marking. He used to be the sweetest, easy gonig lil' pup in the world. Lately, he pees on random objects in the house or garage, and even the bbq. He's randomly aggressive towards certain dogs when on leash or at a dog park. We finally found a descent website outlining all the steps we need to take to remedy this. Basically, we have to go back to puppy times, i.e. goes out to potty on a leash, not allowed out of our site in the house, not allowed to stop to pee when on walks (aka can only go when given the go ahead), prohibited from ever entering areas where he cannot be trusted, we have to work at developing positive associations w/other dogs and behaviors via treats (hello perma-treat-crumb-lined pockets...again), and possibly using sprays and other deterrents from poor behavior. All this re-training is supposed to last for 1-2 months. But, if it works, it's so worth it. I can't stand him being this completely different dog!

The Excitement is Building

Even though I know that my chances each month have seriously diminished, I find myself still excited about pending O. This is a great thing in my opinion. It means I haven't given up...and I have to say (though many would see this as stupid) I find that not charting has created a sort of Las Vegas energy. It's like even though I know the odds are slim to none, I still feel like I have as much of a chance as anyone else. We shall see if this aire lasts post "predicted" O. I may end up second guessing my timing, wishing we'd tried harder, wishing I knew exactly how many DPO I am. But, there's only one way to find out what works best for me!

In the mean time, I'm doing AWESOME in my quest to run three 1/2Ms in 4 months. Week 1 down, and passed w/flying colors! I ran 7 miles like a rock star on Saturday in beautiful Ottawa. The running trails there are extensive and border the river. Couldn't have asked for better progress. I was really struggling this week, and then BAM! 7 miles came like I was back to my old self. I'm pretty optimistic that things were meant to work out this way (or is that the endorphins talking). Oh, I guess I should mention that depending on how the 2nd 1/2 M goes, if I am not pg, I might train for the Full instead of the 1/2! Woooo wooooo.

I also wanted to add that I couldn't have done any of this w/o G. He's been sooooo supportive and right there with me. He ran 7 miles for the 1st time this weekend. He's not planning on running the 1/2 (he's doing the 10K, it will be his 1st). But, he's determined to get as healthy as possible. He is really bringing it to the table as far as trying to do whatever he can to rememdy the SA issue, and is certainly determined to get out of our unhealthy rut regardless of whether it ends in a BFP or not. THANKS BABY!

YER SO MONEY

I've been wrestling with this SA thing. My mood was swinging all over the place. Finally, after swearing off Google and then taking him back like a cheating, no good, bad boy that I just can't get over, I found MFI info on the Mayo Clinic Website. I just had to change my search parameters. Instead of searching for general causes, and "cures," I needed to type in some suspect's names. "Effects of alcohol on sperm morphology" lead me here.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/fertility/MC00023

After reading some more info on babywishes.org, I have realized that even though I make G (or both of us) out to have alcoholism, we really don't. We certainly indulge too much have developed an unhealthy habit. It looks like there really could be something to be said about cutting out alcohol to increase sperm quality. Again, the main attributes of a sperm-healthy lifestyle include: No Drugs or smoking, limited alcohol and caffeine, exercise, fruits and vegetables (organic is best), hormone-free animal products, lots of water, and a daily multi-vitamin. So, only another SA (or BFP?) in 3 months will determine whether this life-style tune up has worked. But, in the least we'll be healthy...and I'll have run three 1/2 Marathons!

Just Relax!

Bwahahahahahahaha. That's what G's sperm factory has been doing! Got the SA results today, and not good. Actually everything is awesome except his abnormal sperm % is high. He only has 4% normal sperm. Boooooooooooooooooooo So, looks like there are no tests to be done for me in the near future. The doc wants to resolve/confirm G's issue before pokin' around my lady parts.

So, G is slated to get into the INFERTILITY Urologist (the I-word, really?) June 1st. This morning, that wasn't that far away. But, now it seems like FOREVER away. But, I guess it's good because G is convinced it's because of alcohol, and has sworn it off. We are going to continue to get back to our old health nut life style...and cross our fingers that things improve. Or better yet, maybe we'll get that BFP!

Dancing Queen

I need to "Get My Head and Body Back."I took this line from a fellow GPer. She expressed this "need" to me when we were talking about how we've let our bodies and heads be consumed by TTC...Even though we may have been convinced this wasn't the case. The scale never lies. My depreciating productivity at home and work, doesn't lie. So, regardless of whether or not our conversation was a pipe dream remniscent of the ramblings friends have in a bar at close, I'm making a point to get my life back on track. I no longer enjoy dancing in the club that is TTC. The lights have turned on and the glitter on the floor has dulled. Most of the ladies that were standing in the VIP line w/me, have long since gone home w/there BFPs.

As I mentioned in last month's check-in (did I mention I'm horrible at keeping a blog???), I'm trying to scale down my efforts. Instead of using the glitter, push-up bras, and skimpy tops I've been using to seduce me a BFP...I'm opting for the a more girl next door aproach. Think bramuda shorts, flip flops and a bikini top. Still totally seduction-worthy, but certainly a different way to skin the cat (pardon the horrible non-vegan metaphor). Let it be said that this lil' girl next door has been to college, spent a few nights in TJ, and is consequently no where near naive (am I the only one who remembers how to spell this word by spelling evian backwards???).

So, what does this mean for chart stalkers, and tickers, and me? Well, I will not longer be charting. I think I have been charting long enough to know I'm close enough to regular. Barring a super-irregular cycle, and even if I have a one off, I think I'm now comfortable to switch from the Timing method to the Covering the Bases method. So far, in 6 cycles, I have O'd between CD 12 and CD16...aiming to have sex at least every other day from the end of AF (or anytime between then and CD10, for that matter) to CD16, should be sufficient to cover the bases. Don't get me wrong, I'm still going to be paying attention to CM and try to take advantage of those days. I'm also going to keep track of my cycle days...So, I'm still agressively TTC, I'm just not charting or using OPKs. I was planning on foregoing all the supplements, but I think that I'm going to stick with taking GTE and EPO until I see EWCM. It seems to have worked nicely the past two cycles.

So, I'm definitely not OUT this cycle, but I went from pretty sure, to doubtful this morning. G is going to try to schedule his SA for Monday morning...and then hopefully I can schedule an apt w/my Doc Wednesday or Thursday (to discuss the results and get BW done). After that, we have to see what the Dx is, and if that's all good, we move onto the HSG. After that, if it's all good, we're just going to keep banging away at it (hahahaha) for a couple more months. If nothing by then, I guess we discuss options w/the Dr. and potentially move to his associate who is a specialist. I'm a planner, but I think this is enough of a plan for now (I'm sure you do too).

In the mean time, I'm going to sign up for 3 races. Try to get back on track at work and at home (cleaning, organizing and renovations). I'll hopefully lose these 5 TTC lbs, get my ass to work on time, and enjoy this SUMMER!!!

BFNs AND Fertility Friends

I warned you, I'm horrible at this.  

Here I am at the end of cycle 5 (though we weren't trying to avoid for 6 cycles).  I have to say that I thought this cycle was it until this morning.  I have taken tests and all are negative.  It's early, but not really that early for me b/c my LPs are usually in the 11 day range.  Though it's important and great to see my LP get longer (trying to be positive this month if it indeed ends in BFN), I want that dang BFP!  I mean duh who doesn't.  But, I have cramps and my boobs are less sore today, and usually if I have sore boobs and they start to get less sore, that mean AF is on her way.  Booooooooooooo  

I'm starting to operate by the you gotta just keep truckin' mantra.  There are people that have been trying for well over a year or longer, and here I am starting to get worried that something's wrong.  I think this next month will be my last month of charting and supplementing.  Instead of Vitex, B6, EPO, Green Tea and VitC, I'm just going to take EPO until I get a OPK+ and take a B-complex.  I'm changing to the B-complex b/c I'm vegan and I should be taking it anyway.  So one more month on my cocktail and one more month charting.  After that, it's OPKs and testing 14 days after OPK+.  Here's hoping.

If I hit the year mark, I can take in the charts I have; but, in the end my OB/GYN's going to want to do his own tests anyway.  Hopefully, it doesn't come to that.  I have to admit though, in the back of my mind, I can't help but think that things really do happen the way they're supposed to.  The closer my "due date" get's to Spring 2010, the better off the hubby and I will be (aka he might graduate then, and be able to work full time).  

In somewhat related news, I have come to the VERY strong conclusion that I WILL see a RE once we hit the year mark, or at least START the process.  My GP BFPB got some not so fun news recently, which reinforces my conclusion.  Other boo-hoo news is my brother and SIL are splitting.  They were scheduled for an IUI on Good Friday, and instead they decided to get a divorce!!!  She was both my friend, sister and fertility buddy.  We would talk about so much.  Anyway, I'm going to move onto next cycle, and after this next cycle...it's back to the lazy new-fashioned way. 

Pill Poppin', No Stoppin'

So, as if I wasn't taking enough supplements with my PNV, B6 and Vitex. Let's not forget that I also throw green and pre-conception tea down my gullet by the gallon. I decided to add a couple more earthy lil' helpers to the mix.

Body, meet Evening Primrose Oil and Vitamin C. I know you and Vit C have met lots of times, but you're going to be seeing each other much, much more. Oh, and while we're on the subject of much, much more I might as well let you know now that you will be peeing clear from now on. That's right, TONS of water will be streaming (literally) through you on a daily, and probably nightly, basis. While we're at it, let get back on the exercise train that we jumped off of a few weeks ago, k?

Yes, yes...it's healthy to be hydrated. Vitamin C boosts your immune system. Exercise is good for your heart and over-all health. But, the real motivation??? That nectar of the baby-making gods that every hopefully-fertile woman wishes to have...EWCM! I know, I know why not try some sort of expectorant? Well, because that's not how I roll. And I've read it only thins it out anyway. Besides, I've had great results from the B6/vitex already, increasing my LP by 2 days!!! Wooooohooooo. I'll just stick to ordering from the same earthy catalogue for now, thanks.

TTC is short for WAITING, AF is short for Strategic Planning for Next Cycle

As anyone knows, TTC involves tons, and I mean TONS of waiting. Waiting for AF to end, waiting for OPK+, waiting to ovulate, waiting until you can take an HPT, waiting for your OPKs (or other internet money saving, baby making aides) to arrive in the mail, waiting for a BFP, waiting for test results, waiting for the Dr. to tell you what's wrong with your lady parts...the list goes on for many I know.....So, I myself am now waiting for two things: AF and my OPKs to arrive in the mail. As my temp. drop today would indicate, I'll probably meet AF for tea either this afternoon, or tomorrow morning. Let this meeting commence!

Speaking of OPKs, I had a lovely little fake out on CD9 last cycle. I ordered 20 of the super-cheapie PIAC-style OPKs, with 5 cheapie HPTs...Why 20, you may ask? Well, here's hoping! I imagine I will use approx 10 sticks this month and next. This would be me hoping that I will "get lucky" in the next two cycles. Why 10 sticks a month? Well, since it appears I was gearing to O around CD9, I can't in good conscience start PIAC any later than CD9. Since I've O'd as late as CD15, that puts me at a max of 7 OPKs to detect O. This month, I wouldn't mind continuing to PIAC after my OPK+ to detect when my surge ends.

For you mathies, let me break it down for you: 15-9=6 +(7*.5)=9.5...What? That's real math! confused? That's because I wasn't finished. Obviously, there is no such thing as 9.5 OPKs, so for simplicity-sake I have rounded up. Yes, Susie? You have a question? Oh, of course it's possible I will use fewer than 9.5, I mean 10 OPKs. But, we were looking for the max, my dear.

Next Cycle Strategic Planning Meeting Minutes:

(I make sure my secretary takes minutes, because DH aka the VP of TTC, is often absent from these meetings...so I just give him the blow by blow, teh he)

1. Sex at least every other day post AF, before CD9.
2. Sex at least everyday CD9 to OPK+
3. Try for extra bonus sex on day of OPK+ or AM sex the following day
4. Continue daily sex (if not dead from humping like rabbits) until confirmed O
5. All the while, PIAC several times, take vitex and B6, and drink gobs of pre-conception and gree tea.

Man, strategically-timed sex makes me SO horny............meeting adjourned.

Laundry Room Renovation

Well, I haven't written in a while, even though I try to write at least once a week. The only time I really get a chance to write is when it's slow at work, or when I have time over the weekend. Well this past weekend I was as sick as a dog and the weekend before my BIL and soon-to-be-SIL were visiting from Ottawa, Canada. While BIL was here, he helped DH finish the laundry room renovation that he started with a friend two weekends before that.

It looks awesome! I'm so happy with the results. With the way our house is layed out, we don't have a lot of options. I just can't believe the difference.
Notice all the pipes and valves that come out of the wall...the old cabinets.

We had to rip down all of the dry wall and recess the piping. I know it doesn't seem like that big of a deal, but it's

totally affected the kitchen access which is next on the list. Also, this is giving us SO much more storage space, freeing up our already cramped and scant kitchen cabinets. It's serving as our dry pantry, more cosmetic effects to follow.

Cracked eggs and teeth

Eggs. Seems to be a spin off of last weeks topic. But, of course the saga of my co-worker being fired is still fresh. Especially today as I over-heard the boss talking about it on the phone, specifically. Thanks for the reminder that I am not secure in this position. Anyhoo, I have enough cramps as it is, and don't need to give my stomach anything else to be mad about.

Back to the eggs...mine isn't fertilized. Hopefully one will be maturing soon, as I am on official cycle #3! In a way I'm actually glad to have made it to cycle #3 for several reasons:
1. I kind of like the idea of striking out a couple times before hitting a home run...more suspense. (At least right now that's how I feel...still in a normal time frame for TTC)
2. My SIL is (hopefully) going to have her first IUI next month, and I would love for her to get pg before or at the same time as me, since she's been trying a bit longer than I have.
3. I'll get to have a drink for V-day and possibly my Bday!
4. If I can't have a drink on my B-day, it's because I will have gotten a BFP! What a fun prospect. Two years ago I bought myself a house for my Bday, so it's only fitting;-)
5. I won't be considered a "drive-by" on GP and actually have people pulling for me there.
6. Barring me losing my job...Hubby will be able to get it at least one more FT semester in college before going PT. Meaning he'll graduate sooner, yay!
7. I have longer to re-establish my post-marathon exercise routine before getting pg, so I can have a healthy pregnancy. (My docs pro running before and during pregnancy!)
8. I can save up a lil' more vacation time for Mat Leave.
9. I have more time to get the house where I would like it to be before baby comes.
10. More time to save more money!

That's me right now, glass half full kinda girl! I'm gonna need that glass at least half full too, to swallow my new supplement regimen. I'm taking B6 this cycle, and am going to start vitex as soon as it arrives in my mail box. I'm back on my pre-conception tea kick as well, and continuing the green tea sippin'. I think DH is starting to get a lil' serious about the first T in TTC too. Which is pretty freakin' sweet. I felt like it was only me worrying about and coordinating everything, which for me gets overwhelming because I very much need him to be in this with me...he is my very necessary teammate in all this. I would not want to do this without him. I know they can't be nearly as involved as the woman, but I just need him to be involved enough that I don't feel like I'm the only one who wants this.

Teeth. I started the process of getting my cracked onlay replaced last week, and it's been a series of annoyances. The temp fell off on Saturday, and has not wanted to stay on since...I went in Monday to get that sucker nailed on, and it lasted, Oh about 6 hours. Anyway, I decided not to call them again because I'm sick of going in all the time...But, have resolved to make due with drug store goop to keep it on and call the DDS to see if they can just get me in sooner for the perm.

Anyway, I'm trying to stay optimistic about EVERYTHING, and not worry about the things that aren't really in my control. I'm very pleased to see that my charts easy to read, and that most things appear to be working correctly...minus the incredible shrinking cycle and somewhat shortER LP length, I have no complaints. Except with these cramps.

Eggs and Eggshells

Today is the second workday after my friend and co-worker got let go (Friday). It was an insane day. I was sick all day that day. Couldn't eat, couldn't concentrate. I have trouble with the latter anyway. It's especially hard because I'm also friends with his GF who still works here. She was so upset for obvious reasons, and the mood around here was so weird. To be honest, we work in the field sometimes. If they hadn't removed his name plate from the door, it would totally feel like he's just out and will be in soon. But he won't. Aside from the fact that he's my friend, from a co-worker stand point, I'm FREAKIN' worried. I've always viewed us as being in similar situations. Not really having a niche here, not being seen as the "superstar" worker as we have always been seen at other jobs. So, selfishly, I can't help but worry about my own stability and I feel like I'm walking on eggshells with this job more than ever...

...that brings us to the eggs. I confirmed O today on FF. That's right. Got me some mighty fine CHs. My charts looking good. I'm no doc, but things appear to be pretty normal on the hormone front. But, I'm not too confident with this cycle. A couple things weren't ideal, and as far as timing goes, I only got a "good" reading. So, it's not for sure, but it's not impossible. The evening that would have been prime was the evening that my friend got fired. I broke down to DH and appologized in advance for him possibly having to drop out of some classes and go full time at work...he was totally supportive, and obviously up to do whatever ended up needing to happen. But, then I started thinking about medical coverage, and being pg. I think that put a damper on my TTC efforts because part of me felt irresponsible. I mean anyone could lose there job at anytime, and unless you know you're going to get laid off, what are you supposed to do? I'm the one with the medical coverage, and if DH went FT at his job, he would be subject to a 90 day waiting period before benefits would kick in anyway.

I guess in a way it's kind of nice, not wanting it so badly. I want to be pg, but I also believe that life is a mixture of fate and hard work. So, I have the "it will happen when it's meant to happen" approach to TTC this cycle. DH and I believe in ourselves, that we can figure things out and get through anything that's thrown our way. We're going to keep trying, and working, but we're not totally in control of variables such as work and the economy. We can't put life on hold just because we're not fortune tellers.

Working Hard or Hardly Working?

Today I decided to move my blogging efforts to Blogspot. Yay.



DH starts school today...if he continues going full time, then he'll only have one more year after this semester! Yay! Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you look at it, he may start attending school PT starting next semester if we get KU in the next few months. He recently started working with an Aerospace company, and could most likely work there full time when ever he's ready. We just think it would be less stressful for both of us, if he was able to bring home the bacon (aka medical benefits) during my maternity leave incase I decide to return PT (if they let me) or we decide that being a SAHM is what we want.



To be honest, my work is threatening lay offs if we don't keep meeting our shareholder quotas. I've only worked here for 2.5 years, and am one of the newest employees. Things have also been slightly slow for me lately. I've never really "hit it off" with this job, it's certainly not my dream job...So, DH working FT would be a great opportunity for me to find that "it" job, spend a little more time on the house, and cover us incase my company does downsize "in these tough economic times." DH's career field is a lot more stable...



Sounds like a downer, but I'm actually in a pretty good mood. It's hump day, and I'm supposed to O this weekend which means lots of fun for me over the next 6-7 days *wink*